Defeating self-judgement 

Being in the corporate world for 15+ years has much influenced on how I operate in my personal life.  I look at 2016 the whole year and divide my goals into a 4-quarter system. And, this quarter, I made a decision to work on my personal goals, and honestly, I have had my ups and downs on this journey.  During the up time, I feel like a superwoman, on the top of the world; however, during the down time, I feel incredibly blue, overwhelmingly judgemental toward self.

From a coach’s perspective, it’s actually healthier to have down time, as long as you are willing to notice, acknowledge, and contemplate your emotions.  These blue moments in life are the most precious time in your coaching journey, because without darkness, there will be no light.

If you feel blue, then try these 3 things to defeat your own self-judgements,

  • Journal … There is no better way than journaling, as your own written words are intimate and expressive.  Write down how you feel, things you do on that day, or even people you yell at or smile at.   The most important part of journaling is to notice the words that you choose to write.  If you write down lots of negative words, then take a moment to cross those sentences out and replace them with positivity.  Play those positive sounds in your mind a few times, and take a few deep breaths, before heading to bed on that day.
  • 16-seconds of bliss … Davidji has been teaching this method to many of his students and to the public.  In my opinion, it’s one of the most effective ways to calm one’s emotions down.

Close your eyes and relax your shoulders.  Deep-Inhale and slowly count from 1 to 4.  Then, hold your breath for 4 counts.  Now, deep-exhale and gently release your breath for 4 counts.  Lastly, hold your breath for another 4 counts.  When you ready, open your eyes and breath normally.

  • Move till sweating out toxins …  In Ayurveda principles, we all have 3 dosha energies in us – vata (space & air), pitta (fire & water), and kapha (earth & water).  When you feel blue and down, your kapha dosha tends to take over your mind and you become imbalanced.  You may feel hard to get out of the house, slow to get to things, or overeat than usual.  If you notice you are kapha imbalanced, then take a fast-walk till you sweat, go to a yoga class that can raise your heart rate, or work out at a gym.  Once sweating toxins out of your body, signal your mind to let go of negativities and re-center.

The journey of life is constant-learning.  With self-awareness and these 3 recommended actions, we can be less judgemental.


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